Fortunate Son Guitar Intro...

Thursday, August 14, 2008

I just realized something the other day. While reading "AK47: the Story of the People's Gun" by Michael Hodges (not that good and in desperate need of an editor who speaks English) I came to realize something. The Vietnam War was fought in the jungle. I know, right!

Don't get me wrong. I knew that the Vietnam War was fought in the Jungles of Southeast Asia long before picking up the book and even before Pvt. Gump went back for Lt. Dan. What caught me off guard was when I put the book down after reading an interesting passage and then staring off into space from the bus which was taking me Nakhon Si to Surat Thani. It then it me like a ton of bricks.

I live in the middle of the freakin' jungle! I then put on my iPod and began to listen to some CCR, proud of the knowledge that was just gleaned from this book.

Paranoid, I turned the music off after about 30 seconds and went back to reading.

I live in the middle of the jungle.

Being Thainapped...

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Being kidnapped is something you can't possibly hope to avoid in this land. The sun rises, breakfast is made, and then you're kidnapped. Not in any sort of mean spirited sense of the word. It's actually difficult to phrase such an action as a kidnapping as you are often a willing participant in this bizarre trek across half of Southeast Asia. But of course you can't say no to such a request because such an a front would appear as being mildly offensive. They are after all offering to take you to some distant place which you have never been before. A free meal might be involved. Perhaps some tea? Never dare ask where you are going! You were already told about this yesterday. But no memory of such an event can be brought forward and as such, you are left confused yet calm. Nothing can possibly go wrong? "Get in..."

Ban Triam School has lost a total of three teachers over the past few months and now they will soon lose more. A goodbye party was held at a wonderful little restaurant just outside of town for two more teachers who have by now already departed us. A full spread of traditional Thai dishes were offered including the staple, rice. My co-teacher and I arrived on time which translates to being roughly thirty minutes early to find our Pa-ah (principle) already sitting at the head of the table. A conductor surveying a mighty orchestra which had yet to show up for the grand show. Yet still proud he stands at his post, prepared to lead sweeping movements and first chairs who would inevitably be lost without him.

We sat down and began to talk about the Euro Cup tournament taking place on the other side of the world. Christino Ronaldo is the next big thing right now and so all of Thailand loves both Manchester United as well as the Portuguese national team. Sunshine fans in the Land of Smiles. It only makes sense considering the miles of beaches available for tanning. This is false hope though. Any true fan of the sport could clearly see that while Ronaldo is quiet possibly one of the finest players on the planet right now, the Portuguese national team is nothing without him. I knew this but did they? Did my Pa-ah?

Shortly there after the rest of the faulty from our school arrived including the two guests of honor. Two teachers would be leaving our school the very next day and while this was a time to celebrate, I had no idea which of the 13 or 14 teachers they were. I leaned over and asked my co-teacher Moosa to solve this riddle for me, QUIETLY!!!. Not being a subtle man, he surprised me by describing the two teachers in a very discrete manor by the way they were dressed. "Sea sit necks to you. Ok? You know hu? And sea weas black. The othe teacha." Ah yes. I knew them well. Well, I knew them well enough in the sense that I knew their faces and could point them out in a police line up if requested. "It was them officer! They shot Kennedy!" I didn't know their names though. One teacher could very easily win the village beauty contest so long as she kept her mouth shut. The second she flashed a smile at the judges though the whole ship was sunk. A quick glimpse would reveal a smile containing multiple rows of teeth. Like a shark. But her personality didn't match. She was shy and quiet nearly all of the time and a simple hello was the whole of our friendship. She was a mute shark.

The second teacher - the one sitting next to me - was a racist caricature of every Asian one could imagine from 1945 America. Propaganda posters of Emperor Tojo couldn't do her justice since if my memory services me right, Emperor Tojo was bald and this young woman had long black hair. I highly doubt they're related but I suppose the possibility does exist and if so, well - I guess that makes for an interesting story then. Someone should illustrate it. Or perhaps just paint her portrait.

As it turned out, my Pa-ah didn't know what I knew about the Portuguese National team. They were due to play the Germans that night and he was so confident about their impending victory as well as their fate as Euro Cup 2008 Champions that he placed 100 baht on the table. This got the attention of the faulty and I suppose that I should have said no but I couldn't turn down a sure thing. So I placed my last 100 baht bill down on the table and the bet was made. Germany won that night 3-2 and feeling guilty over my new found wealth, I gave the money to Moosa for gas.

Following dinner, speeches were made and honors were given. It's very difficult to appear to give a rats ass when a long winded speaker is slowly melting the polar ice caps by filling the surrounding area with oh so much hot air - but this is made even more difficult when one can not understand a single word that is being spoken. Frank Black lyrics were spinning in my mind as my Pa-ah's words literally would have made for the perfect white noise maker. He was turned up to eleven.

Eventually I was asked to give a speech after the rest of the faulty gave short speeches. I pride myself on my bullshit abilities but I wondered if such skills would transfer in a foreign land. Their are of course different topics and subjects which are traditionally touched upon and avoided during such speeches and it would be important for me to know the difference. Another challenge...I don't really speak Thai. So I stumbled through what little I knew speaking about the importance of family and how I thought the school was my family. I told the two teachers about how said I was that they were leaving and how I felt that part of my family was leaving. I told them how sad I was about this but how it gave me hope that if they could make such friends in this community that they could do anything and become very successful in their new communities. Chok-dee (Best wishes/Good luck). At no point did I address them individually or mention their names. It would have been rude, I thought to mention how sad I was that Mute Shark and Lady Tojo were leaving the school. Poor taste indeed.

The evening ended and I was released from my captivity. This release is only temporary as I expect to be kidnapped at any time and at any place in the near future. It is best to keep a over night bag packed and ready. The house should be prepared to be abandoned and all things should be in order for a quick evacuation. This is standard in Thailand. This is standard for those who know they are about to be kidnapped. No guns... just a friendly smile and a meal (more than likely). Laundry will have to wait for tomorrow...unless you're kidnapped again...and again...and again...and again.

Been Busy...

Monday, June 9, 2008

I can remember seeing images of forest fires being broadcast from California for as long as I can remember. The red glow filling the living room like some back ally in Amsterdam now reflecting off of my face nearly every evening. There must be a forest fire nearby. This seems unlikely as everything is too wet...to humid for a small brush fire to run like the devil across the open jungles of southern Thailand. But then again Florida is on fire, or at least it was the last time I heard anything about it. Maybe a hurricane fixed that problem. I suppose anything is possible. This is Thailand after all and anything really is possible. I doubt the far side of the mountain which looks after my village is on fire. Someone would have said something. Instead I am left with the mirroring image of the sunset bouncing its way off of the ocean, mountains, and clouds as it slowly fades away from me and only begins to rise for you. Somewhere in that moment the nights sky begins to fade away leaving everything red. It gives an odd color to the jungle around me.

I wonder if their is a slight moment between when the sun sets just beyond the reach of the ocean and when it begins to rise just above the tree line in the east on the other side of the world. Is it instant or is their a moment of darkness? Is the earth that big?

Not too long ago an e-mail floated around the Internet. Something about how we don't really read or pronounce words anymore but instead only see the first and last letters of a word and make an assumption of what we believe the word to be. I culod plobraby wtire sehntiomg hbrorile aobut yuor mtoehr and I can olny ausmse taht you can alaltcuy raed tihs buaesce of
sehntiomg I raed on the ineertnt. Thai children face this same problem in a slightly different way. Except the ability to pronounce such words eludes them.

Following the compulsory greeting given by the students which is return by myself... parrots speaking to each other... it can be fun to throw the occasion wrench in the works... roughly 28 or so 4th graders sit down and prepare to learn something from the pale skinned foreigner. At the very least he looks funny. This should be interesting for a least an hour. Time to warm up with some basics in pronunciation.

"Are you ready?" although asked rhetorically it is still given with a bit of casual enthusiasm.
"Yes!" a little loud. They could do better.
"Are you ready?!"
"YES!!!"

Repeat as needed in various forms including deep monster style voice and high pitched girlie-man voice. Make sure to include hand gestures and various postures as well.

Three letter nonsense words work best and by breaking them up into the individual letters, they can slowly begin to understand the pronunciation behind each letter and how such combinations of letters can form different pronunciations.


B - A - T
BA - T
BAT

Half the time the words don't even make sense and the other 2/3ths of the time the kids don't even know what the word actually means. That doesn't really mater. The definition doesn't really mater. A bat could be a small piece of fabric found only in Japanese shopping centers. Who cares. They just sounded the word out on their own which is what is really important. Figuring out how to work a dictionary... similar to operating a 1995 Dodge Neon... will have to wait until next week. Or next month. One step at a time. Tiny steps. Very tiny steps. Seriously, don't walk so fast.

Last week I was teaching students in six separate classrooms at two schools while my weekend was spent about two hours south of here in Khao Lak. This morning was greeted by a site evaluation while tomorrow will be another full day of teaching including English club before journeying to Bangkok for further training which will take place in Kon Kaen. Or maybe Kon Kean. Or is it Khon Kaen? Perhaps I'll just say I have a week ahead of me full of further Peace Corps training about 14 hours away from me by bus. A very long journey ahead which I'm not looking forward to although some more time away from site sounds wonderful at the moment. Although I will miss my students every moment I am away from them, I can't help but look forward to the chance to be with fellow volunteers again. We'll be making fart jokes.


P.S. This is a Tokay. Common in Thailand, they can average about 12 to 14 inches in length and primarily eat smaller geckos and larger insects. This guy, whose name is Mr. Tokay, casually lives in my house like an indoor/outdoor cat. He comes and goes as he wishes. We have an agreement. He doesn't hangout in my room and I don't kill him.

Random Thoughts...part II

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

These are some thoughts and inner reflections on the first few months of Peace Corps service here in Thailand. Many of these come from Dale Yurovich, a fellow volunteer while others have been inspired by other volunteers and their own input. Hope you enjoy.

1) You can shower with many different creatures, including frogs, toads, large spiders, thousands of ants, geckos, and ..............

1A) You can get use to or adapt to many things but thus far I have yet to get use to a cold shower early in the morning.

2) Thai's eat more fried foods than any American I know and yet they still maintain that girlish figure. I have yet to discover how this is possible but if I were to eat like this in the States then I would have had my second heart attack last week. Please send all get well cards to my family.

2A) I have never had better fried chicken in all my life and mixing the fried bits with rice is a new favorite treat.

3) Their are more pick-up trucks in Thailand than at any county fair.

4) I can now cook using a wok.

4A) I've now learned two new ways to cook eggs. The incredible, edible, egg is freaking right!

5) All Thai's are deaf forcing them to play and listen to music at volumes which allows the next village over to hear. This holds true for television as well. My neighbor's daughter was watching an early morning children's program today at 6:45am. I know this because I heard it as if it was in side my skull...

6) A polite greeting for a Thai adult is known as a 'Wai'. Hands clasped together at chest level, bow the head, and say Saa-wa-dee-krap/ka. A polite greeting for Thai children is to smack each other on the side of the head as hard as you can. The shoulder is also acceptable although not as painful and thus not as respectable. A good swift kick is also acceptable.

7) I don't use toilet paper anymore and I kind of like it. Seriously think about what you do for a moment. You wipe your own ass with your hand protected only by the thinnest piece of paper you can find. I'm going to have problems shaking people's hands when I get back to the States.

8) If you ever have to wonder how long you should let water boil before it is safe to drink then you should just let it boil some more.

8A) Nope. Still not safe. Let it boil some more.

9) Pooping something solid is a cause for celebration.

10) There are people who have never seen snow.

11) There are people who will never see snow.

12) There are people who have never seen pictures of snow.

13) It is accepted that one should remove his/her shoes before entering any public building or private residence. This isn't really a problem since most people wear sandals.

13A) It's nice to be able to wear sandals to work on a daily basis. Especially when you have to leave them at the door and walk around for most of the day bare foot. I highly recommend it.

14) With regard to food, everything has bones in it. Eat slowly so as to better enable you to pick those bones out.

15) A lot of weird things make a lot of weird sounds at a lot of weird times.

That's all for now. I'm tired and am going to bed.

Week 1 - "I'm not dead yet!"

Thursday, May 22, 2008

So today concludes my first official week of school. I still have some things to work out in terms of scheduling and I didn't actually attend a full weeks worth of school but with how the Thai school system operates, I would actually call this more official than if I had been at school for all four days.

Let's start from the beginning. My original schedule was as follows. Mondays I would be teaching Pratom 4 (4th Grade) from 9:30 - 11:30 and Pratom 5 from 1:30 - 2:30. Tuesdays I would be teaching Pratom 4 from 10:30 - 11:30 and Pratom 5 from 12:30 - 2:30. These classes would be taking place at Ban Triam school with my co-teacher, Moosa. While I know you can all do math, I'll make it easy for you all and just mention that my sum total of teaching at Ban Triam school will be (at this point) 6 hours per week. On Wednesdays and Thursdays I was originally scheduled to teach Pratom 4 from 9:30 - 10:30 and Pratom 5 from 12:30 - 1:30 at Ban Bang Wa school with my co-teacher, Meena. This would give me a total of 10 hours teaching per week.

After running over the numbers again and again in my head, this just didn't seem right to me. Although I might have fought it throughout my life, my Dad and his peers did raise me with a certain work ethic that just didn't make a 10 hour work week seem worth while. I haven't been able to adjust my hours yet with Moosa but I was able to change my hours with Meena yesterday and as a result I am up from working 4 hours at Ban Bang Wa school to working 7 as this was the best that could be done with both of our schedules. I will now be teaching Pratom 6 from 10:30 - 11:30 on Wednesdays as well as two seperate hours of Pratom 3 on Thursdays from 10:30 - 11:30 and from 1:30 - 2:30 (same class). I hope to be able to add more classes at Ban Triam next week as well.

So according to the schedule above, my week should have begun on Monday... but it didn't. Monday was a holiday and school was closed. Wan Visakha Bucha. A Buddhist holiday which I forgot about and no one mentioned to me the week prior. So I was up early and at school on time all alone without any students to teach. In case you were wondering, Wan Visakha Bucha celebrates or remembers the birth, enlightenment, and death of the Buddha. Opps! Forgot. My bad. It's ok. I sent a card. (Was that last comment in bad taste? I think so too.) So actually my work week began on Tuesday at Ban Triam school. No worries. It's not like anything bad could happen by skipping Monday right?

So within the first 10 minutes of my first class this kid breaks his arm. Dumb-ass. I haven't found out yet if it's his arm or wrist but it's broke alright. Sorry if my dumb-ass comment might sound a bit cold hearted but he literally was acting like a dumb-ass. If he was acting like an apple when he broke his arm then I would have called him an apple but he wasn't. He was being a dumb-ass playing around on top of his desk, he fell, and he broke his arm. We sent him to the hospital and I haven't seen him sent. With any luck he is doing ok but I promise you he won't be doing that again.

An interesting thing about the Thai educational system and the methods of parenting. The above comment about how he won't be playing around on top of his desk again... that is how Thai's teach their children. Many Thai children have scars. I have a small scar on my knee from stitches and another on my lip from the same reason. But these scares are small and hardly noticeable now. Almost everyone in Thailand has very large and noticeable scars. I saw one boy today who had a very large scar on the inside of his leg just above his knee. About four inches long. I can't imagine what might have caused such a huge gash but I'm sure a lesson was learned from it. It the States, children are taught not to touch a pan that is sitting on the stove or to touch a stove that is on or something along those lines. If you touch it then you will get burned and it will hurt and it might even leave a scare. In Thailand, they just let the child touch it. The child screams, will cry, and it isn't until a few moments have passed that any attention is paid to the child. Children learn from experience in Thailand and as a result, children are much better able to take care of themselves and each other in many different situations. A major downside are all of the scars.

At Ban Bang Wa school I spent my days in much the same way that I spent my day at Ban Triam. I observed my co-teacher Meena in order to gain a better understanding of her teaching style as well as to evaluate the English level of the various students I would be teaching in the coming weeks, months, and years. I will admit that a few students have impressed me but they are rare among the majority who merely memorize the words which are presented to them and just repeat the sound without fully understanding their meanings.

So that was my week. I've already established an English Club at Ban Triam and I hope to do the same at Ban Bang Wa. I'll be taking pictures all next week and will be posting them ASAP. I'll just let the pictures speak for themselves with a few captions to go along with them. I think from the look of this entry and the rest that I'm starting to get a little word heavy. Maybe I should lighten up...? Probably.

love Chris

Skoole Daz

Sunday, May 18, 2008

You are reading my blog... hehe.......

So I promised to write about my first day of school during one of my previous blogs and as promised, this will be the topic of this blog. I shall not let you down. It was a very interesting day and I’m sorry to say that I did not have my camera on hand otherwise I would be posting pictures of that day along with this blog. I promise to bring my camera to school next week.

I arrived at Bang Wa School early around 8am and was met by my co-teacher Meena along with some of the other faculty. Meena is young, roughly my age, and has only been teaching for a year and a half. We had only met a few times prior to the first day of school but from these meetings I could tell that she was very excited to be working with a ‘farang’ English teacher though she still appears to be very shy. An example of this is the fact that her English is far better than what she lets on.

While the students ran around the school cleaning and preparing for school to begin that morning and for that year, I was in the office helping Meena and another teacher organize all of the books for the school that were to be passed out in just a little while. The school received new books this year and they were only now opening the boxes, which they had arrived in. Lucky for them that when they opened the boxes they were all new school books for a Thai elementary school and not motorcycle repair manuals written in Russian. This is Thailand after all… stranger things could and have happened.

Before we distributed the books to all of the students, all of the students were to line up on the basketball court in front of the flagpole for morning role call. Remember how when you were younger (at least some of you) you would have to stand up with the rest of your class and say the Pledge of Allegiance every morning? This is nearly the same thing but instead of doing this in the classrooms, the entire school comes out and organizes themselves by grade and prepares to do something similar. Some schools have their own band, which plays the Kings anthem while others just play a recording over the PA. After this and sometimes before this, the principle or a leading faculty member will often give a speech of some kind. Not really a “Win one for the Gipper” kind of speech but also not really just a regular morning announcements kind of speech either. It was after this speech that I walked up and introduced myself to the students. I told them my name and where I was from and asked if anyone spoke English. When everyone suddenly had a scared look on their face, I said it was ok because what I was saying is all the Thai that I know. I then told them that if they teach me Thai then I would help them learn English and they cheered. After my brief speech, I asked Meena if anything I said in Thai made sense or if the students were trained to cheer when a teacher is finished speaking. She said both.

Afterwards, Meena and I worked out a schedule of when I would actually be teaching at Bang Wa school. It was understood that I would be teaching on Wednesdays and Thursdays but the times were unknown at this point. After figuring out the schedule for the school, we figured out that it would be best for us to teach at 9:30 and then again at 12:30 for one hour each. This schedule was to begin that day but on both occasions I looked down at my watch to realize that it was 10 and 1 respectfully. We arrived a half-hour late to both classes but it was Meena who said, “Ok, I think it’s time to go now,” on both occasions. Peace Corps warned us that Thai teachers have a different dedication to their classrooms than American or even Western teachers do. If someone calls in the middle of a class, they will answer and go outside to talk on the phone. Sometimes they will leave class to go “mail” something at the post office or perhaps even go to the market to buy something leaving the class unattended during that time period. I have not witnessed much of this to any full degree but many other volunteers have and have expressed how frustrating it is.

I teach Pratom 4 (4th Grade) and Pratom 5 (5th Grade) at Bang Wa school which will be the same grades I will be teaching on Mondays and Tuesdays at my other school, Ban Triam. There are 10 5th graders and 15 4th graders at Bang Wa school, which will make some activities very easy to conduct and execute. During my first day I further introduced myself to the class and Meena and I attempted to review some of the material that they had learned the previous year in order to gain a barring on where to begin this year. To be honest, this was just filler which would be followed by a quick game. It has been proven time and time again that typically Thai students learn vocabulary words but never fully understand the meaning or how to use such words in a sentence nor do they ever fully understand the sentences which the learn in class. Rather they just memorize them, which is just enough to make their teachers happy.

So we reviewed what kind of animals they know and then played a short game using that knowledge having the boys of each class play the girls of each class. In case anyone was interested, The boys just barely beat the girls in Pratom 4 but the girls carried the day in Pratom 5. After finishing up class I met up with Meena and we attempted to lesson plan for the rest of the term. Just a general outline of the subjects that she would like to cover and what materials I can bring to the table. This meeting didn’t last as long as I had expected as Meena is planning on teaching straight from the book. I showed her an example of a sample lesson plan I had made using various Peace Corps materials and I think it intimidated her a little bit. I don’t think she has ever prepared something so extensive or thorough before. But at the same time I hope that she came away from the meeting feeling that I will be a big help to her and that we can learn a lot from each other.

So that was my first day at school or at least at Bang Wa school. Tomorrow I will be starting school at Ban Triam school with my other co-teacher Moosa. Tomorrow should be equally interesting and fulfilling.

That’s all for now.

Chris

Current Music: Jimmy Buffet – License to Chill
Current Weather – Partly Cloudy (Second day in a row of kinda sunny)
Current Thought – I have 30 minutes to prepare for a wedding and I’m hungry…

Random Thoughts...

Saturday, May 17, 2008

This won't be long. I just have a thought or two. You know what's awesome about living in a tropical climate? (And people who have lived in a tropical climate for any extended period of time will understand what I mean...) Mold and Mildew. I returned home from the teacher training in Phang Nga that I was working at over the past week or so only to find most of my house and cloths to be covered in mold and mildew. What a wonderful surprise mother nature has left for me.

I said thank you and proceeded to go out side to burn my trash. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours. It's very simple. Right now I'm soaking my clothes in tubs of laundry detergent/vinegar in a hope that I can some how get rid of the mold. I'll let you know how that turns out. I'm really hoping that I can get my laundry done soon because it's actually sunny out today which means my cloths might actually get dry.

That's it really. I don't really have anything deep or insightful to say at the moment. Damn mold is pissing me off. If I start to turn green then I'll be sure to take a picture before scraping it off and taking a shower.